Hey Girl, It's Barack Obama

Hey girl,

If the guy who revealed how much body fat his body holds but only two years of his tax returns lied about how fast he ran a marathon, I can promise you he’s lying about caring about your family’s financial situation.

Hey girl,

Under Romney-Ryan, fertilized eggs and Walmarts are considered people but living, breathing, thinking people are given no consideration, no chance.  

Hey girl,

Republicans think that the minority son of a middle class single mother had connections at Harvard Law making me the editor of the Law Review?  Save it.

Hey girl,

Mitt picked Paul Ryan, Medicare Slayer.  Joe and I are going to shoot some hoops and then you and I are going dancing.

Hey girl,

Every time I pick up a pen to respond to a letter from a citizen, I end up writing your name plus mine in a heart with an arrow through it.  I just can’t get you off my mind.

Hey girl,

Is that the DOW in your pants or are you just happy to see me?

Hey girl,

I told Eric to keep his slimy hands off of my girl’s right to reproductive autonomy and privacy.  Creep.

Hey girl,

I’ll stick to burgers.

Hey girl,

Oh, the dude who tied his dog to the roof of his car, who tied his dog to the roof of his car, who says he is unconcerned with the very poor when he has a car elevator and a dancing horse, who forcibly cut the hair of an LGBT youth in high school for jokes, and wants to overturn the healthcare program which he helped start, has a 30% likeability rate?  

Well, gee, I am stumped.

Hey girl,

When Sean Hannity asks me to describe myself in a few words, let it be these: American, feminist, your man.